Green Cleaning Machine

The ongoing eco follies of Lizz Winstead. My carbon footprint went from a size nine to a size five.

By Lizz Winstead

Illustration by Michael Byers

Luckily, when you Google, “Throwing out my ex’s stuff,” there are 2,140,000 entries. Maybe I’ll just add all the old cleaning supplies to the box of the ex’s stuff and use one of those ways to dispose of it—even if that much toxicity in one container could violate the Kyoto Protocol.

Wait, the United States didn’t ratify that one. Hmm—not a bad idea.

Lizz Winstead is co-creator of  The Daily Show, and former co-host of Air America’s Unfiltered. She currently stars in Shoot the Messenger, a satirical review of the media world running in New York City (

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Wrong wrong wrong! This couldn't be more misguided, and from the co-creator of the daily show. One expects more insight with such a title.

The last thing the world needs is everyone throwing away or recycling (which still uses energy and resources and produces pollutants) their current collection of toxic stuff and CONSUMING another pile of less toxic stuff. The new stuff may be 'green', or may just have a new 21st century green marketing campaign label on it. Don't throw it out, use it up! Wear it out. Make it do, or do without. Consume less. Less soap, less hot water, less plastic wrap, paper towels, etc. Use smaller pieces, and make it last longer (conserve). Be more efficient and careful with what you have. You have PLENTY enough already to last you a long time. Then, in several years, when you do finally run out that toxic product, then you can go purchase a more responsible alternative.

You've been using the same toxic junk for your whole life - using up the box won't kill you, but suggesting that all of us should abandon our half empty boxes of whatever and go consume more stuff is deranged. For a more comprehensive explanation, see:

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